What we can learn if we listen.
As a life coach I know that one of the most important things in our work is the ability to listen and listen well. It is referred to as “active” listening, where you want to catch every word and hear exactly what is being said because it is essential to your work and the client you are serving. On National Indigenous Day, I couldn’t help but think what could be different if only we listen.
If listening skills are employed from the beginning, then the nuance of the Indigenous peoples stories can teach us so much more about who they are and how they show up in this world. What I “hear” is, the Indigenous peoples have the ability to step into a Coach position in almost anything they take on. Within their unique culture, amidst all its diversity and resilience, they replicate several of the tools used by a master coach.
Indigenous peoples skill for patience is something that has been handed down over years of big picture thinking when it comes to things like the environment and its management for future generations to be able to care for and sustain their children. They recognize the power of selection and taking only what is needed for life to continue.
Self-questioning that promotes intrigue and self-reflection mirrors the solution focused approach and solution problem solving. Indigenous peoples tend not to tell, but to ask what is next, how can this be different, not unlike a Coach helping a client become empowered to produce positive outcomes from inside of themselves. They have always demonstrated a curiosity, which gives them a creative edge that looks forward in a joyful way.
While most of us rush through our lives looking “busy” and being heard loudly, we think that translates into self fulfillment and productivity, our Indigenous neighbours are completely comfortable in the quiet. Knowing when to be “silent” is another tool required to be an amazing Coach. When you allow yourself to think or reflect as opposed to having to react, a flood of ideas can be realized. We may feel like we are afforded little time to be silent, yet if we were to incorporate this as a habit then we would soon learn that being with ones self in silence has a therapeutic effect and can increase healing and resolution through reflection.
One of the biggest triumphs that I honor with Indigenous peoples is their dealing with fear through incredible bravery. Coaches, especially us who work in the Trauma and healing of trauma, know that the one thing that is needed to survive and create new ways of moving through life is the ability to face fear and change without recoil. The indigenous people have demonstrated this over decades. They have faced the unknown, their stories are filled with bravery and resilience. They have risen up time after time and survived all that has been dealt to them. With the awareness that National Indigenous Day brings, my hope is that this time we listen, and listen deeply to support our fellow humans in their healing, identity and presence.
Brad Hardie, PCC, ECPC, PNLP, MPNLP Trauma Informed Coach,
Families & Couples Coach, Stress & Chaos Management, Facilitator,
Founder of Moving the Human Spirit.
Make a plan, form a habit!
When we speak to any of our clients about the importance of taking time for themselves and making sure they are acknowledging "self-care", we have a responsibility to also educate them on what that is. Self-care refers to the ability, in a healthy manner, to deal with and be successful at everyday living as an individual. Making healthy choices, getting enough exercise to contribute to your physical wellbeing, eating properly and staying mentally and emotionally fit so we are able to work through, and enjoy life are all signs of self-care. Some of the basic approaches to self-care involve things like, choosing a healthy diet, monitoring and controlling drug and alcohol consumption, physical exercise in many forms, self regulation of emotions and making sure you are keeping up with hygiene and medical conditions that may need attention. Healthy Mind + Healthy Body = Healthy You!
In our line of work we start by looking at what our clients “want” and how they may “get it”. Self-care is no different. As with all things, it is necessary to take the time to go in deep and find what self-care actually means to you. What may work with one person does not always work for the other. One commonality for all is to make self-care habitual in your life and to have a plan in place to do so. Lets consider what a basic self-care plan may entail.
Make sure you are getting your sleep and eating healthy options that keep your body happy and maintained. As important as it is to spend time with friends, family and partners, you need to ensure you have clear boundaries so we can tune out for a while. Have a routine that gets you out and exercising on a regular basis and make it something you enjoy and want to do. Enjoy mindfulness, relaxation and self-reflection when possible. Meditation, nature walks and yoga are some activities that people report as therapeutic. Get a mentor that represents the positive aspects of living that you would like for yourself. A person in your life that you respect and look up too that is living a life very close to the one you would like to be living and use them as a supportive role model.
As with any plan we must now implement it and make sure we maintain it for best results. Something to think about here is your level of commitment to this plan and what may prevent you from actually following through with it. Aim to remove obstacles that may discourage you from completing the plan. Set out a twenty-one  day challenge for yourself to help make the plan a healthy habit. Above all, make sure you enjoy what you are doing for self-care and you will be more likely to continue and make it part of your lifestyle.
Brad Hardie, PCC, ECPC, PNLP, MPNLP
Balancing the aftermath of trauma through Solution Focused Coaching with MTHS.
For some people living with PSTD, the idea of having a balanced life can seem an impossible feat. Moving the Human Spirit (MTHS) has been successfully navigating these waters with great results. With 1 in 10 Canadian’s affected by this diagnosis, it cannot be easily ignored or forgotten about. Post Traumatic Stress Disorder became mainstream news when numerous troops who where subjected to horrific situations in war torn countries returned with sever mental disorders and constant hyper-vigilance. This was due to the conditions they were witness to and the traumas they survived. Living in this state, the most severe cases found no other relief but to end their own lives. Most recently we have seen the effect of trauma locally with the wildfire in Fort McMurray and the environmental factors, poverty and violence within our indigenous communities.
As Certified Trauma Counsellors and Trauma Informed Coaches, we provide the guidance for clients to respond to these difficult challenges and live a full and rewarding life. We foster positive inquiry for the focus of changing negative conditions and creating powerful outcomes that are measurable.
• “Life is complicated, and often muddled with expectations, habits and emotions. It was very helpful to have the one-on-one coaching sessions to help to dis-entangle the attachments and clarify my options.”
• “If you are looking for clarity in any given area in your life, and an effective way of coming up with solutions for yourself, I would highly recommend MTHS.”
• “In the hectic business of our lives, it's easy to lose focus of the health of the relationships that matter most. MTHS has given us (couple) the tools to navigate through our own relationship complexities.
People become focused on the negative consuming their lives; they forget to ask, “what could be?” That is where the change begins. So we ask the simple question “What do you want instead?” We start there, right at the base. A solution-focused approach employs a number of techniques that engage and stimulate actual change. MTHS specializes in post-traumatic growth, trauma informed coaching, trauma counselling, anxiety and stress management and mindfulness in all aspects of life.
Providing a supportive and logical framework for clients to generate their own powerful solutions fosters resilience, contributing to their own health and wellbeing. They become inspired to over come barriers and form new neurological pathways. They choose the path; we walk beside them on their road to change.
It is to everyone’s advantage to become more aware of a solution focused approach and what they can do to change the environment they live in. Go to www.movingthehumanspirit.com and find out more about Trauma Counselling and Trauma Informed Coaching and its benefits.
Brad Hardie, PCC, ECPC, PNLP, MPNLP
MTHS talks PTSD, Anxiety and Stress at